The (should be) simple things at work..

By popular request, I am publishing the Achievement list. I have removed any information that can be used to identify this list with a business. I will update with the appended list at some point Initiation Put down a AB pack on your first day without being ill. Man V Food Devour 6 chicken fillets and 2 large chips (The T.box) from KFC in less then 15 mins. Punish3r Abuse the dominoes manager reminding them of how arse paper their pizzas are and get a voucher for 5 more pizzas. Rage Quit Exit the building over the rail and remove the rear muffler on your current vehicle to be loud and proud (defected). Ground Zero Drop the pay packet off in your chair (Fart) by following through slightly and seeing how many people you can make gag in the toxic odour. Evacuation Co-ordinator Force at least 3 people to leave their desk after dropping the pay packet in...

Things we do to waste half a day of being completely non-productive Employee feedback This isnt even enjoyable Hate doing it A huge waste of time Submitting timesheets Another way to burn time for no company benefits Responding to retarded email Pretty self explanitory I am  pretty sure I could triple my efficiency at work if I didn't have outlook open. Project managers A good way to ensure that you lose an hour talking about what needs to be done, several times a week, wasting the time when you could actually be getting the work done For someone who doesn't do anything, I guess they need to justify earning twice as much as I do. Same applies for business Analysts. OH&s meetings With some exemptions, these meetings mostly consist of preventing people with an IQ of 60 from accidentally killing themselves Making Graphs/ Formatting documents with COLORS! Managers seem to like it when you pretty reports up, regardless of if it takes three times lon...

Pretty sure the ultimate failure in all Hosting and Internet service providing companies is their documentation teams. Here re my opinions/experiences: Approving documentation: 6-12 Months Documentation system maintenance: Never Organizational/layout skills: My 8 year old Sons is better... Knowledge of the product: Minimal Product choice: May as well be a blind man choosing which painting he likes the most. How much they should be paid a year: Should be volunteer status only. No monetary worth what so ever. Should fire the lot of them...